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oh deer.

you're mad. I get it.

but I still don't know why.

you were so fucking cruel.

all I could do was cry.

it's not my fault...

your perception is different than mine.

but I swear everything I did when we were small

I did to protect you, really that's all.

that's all I ever wanted to do...

was to protect you.

and keep the things that happened to me from happening to you.

I know your life is different, but so is mine.

we were raised differently and that's totally fine.

I understand that, but why can't you?

our dad loved me. he fucking loved you too.

I don't mean to keep bringing it up. but you don't have a clue.

our mother didn't fight her OWN battles and that fucking affected me too.

it should never be the way it was.

we were ALL supposed to grow up with love.

but we didn't get that.

only you did.

so I did what I do best, and I hid.

because she ran away from her problems and gave me away.

my problems were too much for her so she let me go astray.

"druggie" or not; I just can't believe it.

why was so much put on me? i was never allowed to be free.

It's really messed up that you blame me.

I was never supposed to be your fn mother.

remember you ARE my brother.


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